Whatever happened to Jane?

She cut her hair and died, I guess. As did a way of life. My way of life.

Poison. Ratt. Dokken. Bon Jovi. Queensryche. Megadeth. Metallica. Twisted Sister. Cinderella. The Cult. Wasp. Guns ‘n Roses. L.A. Guns. Bang Tango. Tesla. Motley Crue. Van Halen. Ozzie Osbourne.

Where did all the good music go? I mean, I like new music but I’m not finding a lot of feel good music. I remember when Warrant and Skid Row were Gods. I mean, really Gods. And I wanted to be just like them.

I remember when women swooned because of fucking CC Deville and Brett Micheals. I remember when Def Leppard fucking ROCKED THE HOUSE! I remember when Suicidal Tendencies were cool as hell. I remember Sebastian Bach spitting on the crowd and telling us we were fucking nuts. And we were.

What happened to the hair bands? Did the grunge-come-alternative movement kill them forever? I mean, spandex and Aquanet faded away to body odor and camouflage pants hacked off at the knees. Not that I have anything against the alternative boom because I love some motherfucking Smashing Pumpkins and Nirvana although I never was as much of a Nirvana fan as a lot of my buddies.

Now, Alice in Chains, they fucking rocked. But my point is this: Where can I get all the music I used to love? Whitesnake anyone? What’s become of the music I grew up on? I read a while back on Keene’s blog that he has signed up for Sirius Satellite radio. Good move. You can get all the music that used to be played on Headbanger’s Ball. Fuck Adam Curry, by the way. I’m with Riki Rachtman.

I guess it was when short hair became cool outside of punk and soft rock circles that the hair bands became passé. I remember when Jon Bon Jovi cut his hair and did the Young Gun’s soundtrack. And when Kirk Hammett cut off his hair. Yep, I really think that when short hair became cool it was the beginning of the end. You can’t have a hair band without long hair. Long, wild, slinging everywhere. It just doesn’t work that way. So I guess it was when short hair came back into fashion that the hair bands died and I grieve for them still. But you know what?

Every rose has its thorn. And you don’t know what you got till it’s gone. But in the still of the night, when I wanna rock, and I'm sitting around remembering breaking the chains, I can still join BMG and order greatest hits CDs of my favorite ‘80’s bands online and get overnight delivery.

Jb